Worst. Day. Ever.

Yep... it's my birthday. What makes it worse is turning 36 meaning inching closer to 40. It's always ok for guys to get older but never for girls. We are always more criticized as we get older. More attention is paid to our looks as we are no longer 18. We are no longer those cute young things in cheerleading outfits. We are now caring more for comfortable shoes to wear and bras that will keep us held up at this point. Life is no longer our oyster. That time now belongs to someone else.

But it also has it advantages. We no longer care. We at least I don't. I don't give a shit if I have a waist or curves or that I have crow's feet around my eyes. I just only wish that I was 40 and get to it. I am looking forward to actually being 40. There is nothing that is more "punk" that a 40 year old woman cause really... they are the ones that will tell you to fuck off in a minute and don't give a shit any longer how they look in public cause if you don't like, don't fucking look.

The best part about all this: yesterday I put on my Ramones t-shirt that my mom gave me the money for when I went and seen them play on my 17th birthday in Detroit. First time out of five that I ever saw them play. 17 year old Angie is still keeping up with 36 year old Angie. I still haven't changed. I started playing music in the 4th grade and I'm still playing to this day. First band I was in was when I was 12 or 13.... can't remember anymore. Here is that young Angie still keeping up with old Angie. The best part: I have not changed. All these years have passed by and I am still the same woman. I have hair now as I used to be bald back then. I'm covered in tattoos as I was too young to have them then. But I am still the same me. No soccer mom here. No real estate agent. Just me.

Damn it feels good to be a gangsta....

R.N.R.H.K.

Angie